Dark Day


It is always a dark date/day for me.  It is still hard, but it is getting easier.  I smile more now when I remember and cry less.   I have some awesome friends that posted some pics on FB that brought back some great memories and some laughs, as well as a few, OMG…what were we thinking!  Bitter sweetness.  February is a tough month with all of the loss experienced.  I allow myself the whole month to swan dive into the pit of apathy, wallow around in it, and then GTFO.  Tomorrow will begin my Spring.



Hope…a funny thing it is.

When I was younger, I was filled with hopes and dreams, rather the idealistic type that is so appropriate for youth lacking real world experiences. Though I changed directions late in the game, the same hopes and dreams remain. Some I’m living, some I’m still hoping for…and waiting…lol.

I grew up with a chronically ill father who suffered in ways that looking back now, seems unimaginable, but they did not then because my father was always filled with so much hope and positive energy. His hope for health, for medical progress, and ultimately a cure kept him alive for as long as he did live. His hope was infectious, and empowering, and despite his illness, he forged out a very successful life because he simply did not lose hope. He died young, 52, but he lived every minute of every day that he was physically able. I recall thinking then that in the instance of his death that even false hope is had better than no hope at all.

For me, as I progress forward in my life, career, hope is always present. To lose hope despite some very life altering hurts along the way seemed like swinging the doors wide open and inviting in defeat. To do so would seem unnatural to me.

I took some time (a lot) yesterday to read the thread from the link that I posted in my previous blog entry. I recognized how my experiences online and with different individuals have caused my views to change in some regards, not all. I have grown more cynical for sure…but I have grown. My life is good and I recognize how fortunate that I am, when so many are not. I hope that I keep growing from my experiences, the good ones, as well as the bad. I hope that the work each day makes the difference in the lives of the children we make therapies for, and the adults as well. Mostly, though it has been difficult from time to time, I hope that I never lose hope and that I have the mental and emotional acuity to recognize the good, the strength, and the growth that is born from adversity.

Read moar 🙂

And the Winner Is….

Wow that was a fast week!

Picking a winner was really tough because everyone blew me away with their freebie fabulous alts!  But alas…I must pick a winner…and the winner of the 10,000L is http://www.flickr.com/photos/92368929@N02/12225970393/in/pool-2469793@N25/lightbox/ – That is one FABULOUS Alt!  Congrats!

That said, I could not get past how very nicely put together this alt is http://www.flickr.com/photos/venuspetrov/12224817044/in/pool-freetobeyoucontest and what a handsome male freebie fab alt this is http://www.flickr.com/photos/uccellopoultry/12239989626/in/pool-freetobeyoucontest !  So, I’m awarding a tie for second place with a payout of 3000L each!

I’m so impressed with the skins and shapes of our last two contestants, that I am giving a 1000L for their rocking style!  http://www.flickr.com/photos/bluecymbidium/12210125606/in/pool-freetobeyoucontest and http://www.flickr.com/photos/106043496@N08/12240069773/in/pool-freetobeyoucontest

Thanks all for playing along!  I hope you all had fun!