20 Personal Questions Meme

nerdgoggles_001

Meme instructions: Answer the following 20 personal questions about your Second Life. Don’t forget to share a link to your post in the comments!

  1. When and how did you discover Second Life? – I honestly do not recall.  Based on my rez date it was 2007 😛
  2. Did you know about virtual worlds before or was this your first experience with them? –  I have always been a gamer, but no, the virtual world was a new concept for me and Second Life was my first experience.
  3. Has Second Life met your expectations? –  I can’t say that I had any expectations.
  4. If you could teleport back to the first ten minutes of your avatar’s slife, what would you tell yourself? – Pick a name that is not related to your career so that you will not constantly be reminded of work via your avatar name. Dumbass.
  5. How long did it take you to master avatar flying and driving vehicles inworld? – Avatar flying, never had an issue, driving…lol…yeah, still working on that.  It has only been 7 years, stop rushing me!
  6. Do you have a mystery alt? – No, I have no mystery alts.  I have a couple of building alts for poses and furniture building, and I reserved the name Ima Resident…All of my alts have been named in the forums or on the feeds at some time or other.
  7. Is your SL avatar a reflection of you, or someone you wished you could be? – Ima looks like me, because for some reason I don’t “feel right” when she does not resemble the RL me.  Personality, no, nothing like RL operator.
  8. Is there an individual you met in SL that inspired you in your RL? How? – Yes…inspired, because he has been there done that…usually our conversations revolve around career and I’m quite married to mine…he has offered good advice that I have occasionally, regretfully ignored 😛
  9. Do you feel it is easier to create stronger bonds/relationships with people you meet inworld as opposed to the real world? – This is difficult question…Gah, Berry!  I have always been very shy in RL and I am free of that shyness in SL…to some degree.  Just like RL, I have a group of people that I feel very comfortable with and one person who I just tell everything…lol…poor guy.
  10. Did you ever imagine or believe people could fall in love with someone they never met before Second Life? – Sure, it is not that unbelievable really.
  11. How has your perspective of dating changed (or not) since you started playing second life? – I have a RL significant other so I don’t date in SL. No perspective change for me.
  12. How has your perspective of employment changed (or not) since you started playing second life? – Not really.  After I had my daughter, I wanted to stay home with her for at least the first 24 months.  I had plenty of savings, but I wanted to maintain an income so I consulted from my home office and most of my work took place virtually.  I would say, as you did, that I was somewhat amazed at the ability to make excellent bank selling digital goods and land…but as a gamer…not that far a stretch I don’t suppose.
  13. Name three things in both your lives that overlap each other significantly. – The creativity and love of decorating are the only two things that have a significant overlap.
  14. If you could live your life more immersively in a virtual world, would you? (Kind of like the Matrix) – No…I prefer to know where my heads at all the time 😛
  15. How do you think behavior changes for people if they’re inworld vs in real world? Why do you think that is? – It is hard to say.  For me, it takes the edge off of the shyness.  Some say others are ruder in SL because they can hide, but who really knows if they are a raging asshole in RL or not?  Also, in your RL, you have  far better control over the personality types you deal with than in SL.  I have met individuals that bring out a side of me that I would have otherwise ever known existed.  I’m sure that happens to others as well.
  16. How has second life consumerism changed your perception of spending habits, the value of money, the need to be “bleeding edge” with fashion? – I’m not here enough to be bleeding edge with fashion because it, like most things in SL, change too rapidly for me to keep up.  I spend a lot of money in SL…a stupid amount of money.  What is worse in the constant replacement of gaming laptops just to have the latest Nvidia card…I’m going to stop…I swear…right after I order this next computer…promise!
  17. Do you think virtual worlds like SL drive and redefine human interaction or do they narrow and limit it? – I think it does redefine human interaction, especially for us gamers who were content to lock ourselves in a room, dare human interaction, until that $60 one player game was completed successfully.  The world is becoming more digitally social, but it is not doing much for rl interpersonal skills amongst the emerging generation.
  18. If technology progressed tomorrow to allow you to send emotions to people the way you’d send text or voice messages, would it enrich your SL experience or infringe on it? – INFRINGE!  CODE RED.  DANGER, DANGER!
  19. Name three skills you attribute to having learned or honed in second life alone. – Blender, GIMP, cussing under my breath.
  20. If your grand kids googled your Second Life Avatar’s name, would they be intrigued, disgusted, proud or something else? – All of the above.

More: http://strawberrysingh.com/2014/05/26/20-personal-sl-questions-meme/

Open Letter to SR-STFU

whatI actuallysaid whatIdidnotsay2whatI actuallysaid

To be clear without your victim spin-If you have something to say to or about me, then say it to or about me on my feed or on this blog.  It is open.  Always has been.  Your passive-aggressive bullshit is old and tired.  Battle to the end is not about winning or losing as there is nothing to win or lose here.  It means, bring your sorry cowardly ass to my feed, or this blog and say what you have to say directly to me.  Get it out of your system so that YOU can move on and stop posting through direct naming or by way of implication about me on your feed, in your profile, or on your blog.  It is time for you to stop acting your avatar age and start acting like a grown adult.

I don’t give one fuck about your tales of woe.  Your made up tales about a sociopath…Did you forget that you posted every detail of that scenario for all to read?  Do you really think that people did not read his rejection of you and you boldly driving to the “sociopaths” house to tell his wife of the affair and emailing his work so that he did not get out of the relationship with you “scot free” did not frame you as the sociopath?  You truly are delusional.  Where exactly do you think the logic is in that you were not afraid to go to his house in real life person, but your were afraid to log into pixel land because of him.  Asinine. Your life sucks because you made it suck.  Suck it up.

I have not stalked you for years or even a minute.  What I have done, instead, is where I see you posting about me by name or by implication is post about you.  And I will continue to do so until such time as you STFU and cease ever mentioning me in any way, shape, or form on any blog, feed, or forum.  The choice is yours, so if you truly do want the shit to be over, then STFU.

So, to summarize, in case you are still having difficulty comprehending, battle to the end means, bring your horseshit directly, post like a grown up and stop being a passive aggressive coward.  The feed is big enough for the both of us.  If you want it to end, then end it…STFU.   You can rest assured that should you stop your woe is me character assassination attempt on Ima, you will hear nothing more from me about you.   It’s true, you can ask your rather well behaved alt…I don’t bother with her.

STFU.  Bye.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Old School

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Yesterday was the 3rd best day of my real life.  It was so good, I had to smoke a cigarette at the conclusion.  It did not start out that way. No, instead it was just a comedy of errors from the moment my feet hit the floor.  I had loaded a new update to my Note 3 phone, not realizing that it would knock out my programmed alarms.  I overslept so I had to hit the ground in a mad dash because I needed to be at a meeting within the hour.  My daughter is out of school so I had to get her to my mother’s house, which is not that far, but of course the traffic was insane.  However, my mind was so focused on getting to my meeting on time, I drove half way to work before I realized I had not dropped her off!  Damn!  I made it in time for the meeting only to find out it had been cancelled, which I would have known if I had not left my work cell on the charger at home.   Next I headed for my office to find the President of North American Operations sitting in front of my desk.  Oh shit…this means either something really bad has happened or something really great is about to happen.   Something great happened and my crazy morning culminated into that moment where you could swear the sky parted and the angels sang just for you…It was the moment where the blood, sweat, and tears were confirmed as well worth it…finally…I have reached my goal.  It is true that nothing worth having is easy though.

Which leads me to today.  I have been working in Blender all day, determined to understand the error of my ways.  No such luck.  What worked for me last week has not worked today so I had to take the dog for a walk around the block so I could utter a series of expletives out of earshot of the fam.  Good gawd I do not understand why I have such difficulty with this program…But, alas…I do, and I decided not to irritate myself further with it today.

I like building with prims, but clearly that is not practical anymore in SL.  To sate my building desires, I have been using a product that I absolutely love that allows for a mesh build but with the old school feel of prim building.  I have found the products of  ZimberLab give you the joy of a mesh build with the added bonus of building old school.  These products are worth every L as they are richly detailed, snap to grid, and they come with all of the AO maps so that you can make your textures with the same depth you would with a baked texture.   I would be remiss if I did not mention the customer service…always responds quickly, patiently, and with excellent advice.  If you are like me, and career and family do not allow you to spend the requisite hours of educating yourself on the popular modeling programs so that you can produce something in short order, I highly recommend these products.  They are outstanding.

I will not give up on Blender.  I have made a great deal of progress, but I’m still at ground zero as far as I’m concerned…so for relaxing, I will enjoy the delightful creations of others to fulfill my building goals.   Nothing worth having is easy.

Happy holiday weekend to you USA’ers!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Identity

I spent the last few day knocking the noob off the alt.  I did not find it to be that much fun because I constantly found that I had to struggle not make the new avatar into an Ima twin.  Finally, she was equipped with all the best, latest, and greatest…and I just could not connect to this new avatar.  It felt awkward, and I was overthinking every little move, including posting a pic on the feeds…Style might be a give away.

More than anything, I really could not get past the feeling of the alt being somehow just plain dishonest.  Dishonest with myself, mainly.  I have identified with my Ima Rang avatar for nearly 7 years, and wow, I miss my pixel chick!  I miss my friends, the feeds, and somehow, I really miss a piece of me.   It really changed the feel of SL for me.  I did not even have a desire to log in the alt today.

To be, or not to be…really is the fucking question.  At this point, it felt like I had to make a decision as to which scenario was more uncomfortable…Not having the comfort of my pixel chick or the relentless name calling and empty accusations.  Yeah, I guess I will just have to put up with the name calling and the lies.  It really is only important that I know the truth about Ima’s operator.   I want to continue to experience the joy that SL brings me, but that is not going to happen without Ima…So bye bye alt, I hardly knew ye…

Go ahead and tell us how many you made a bet with…We know you will 😛

I’m going on a love fest…!  MWAH!

 

 

 

 

Ima Off the Grid

I had a brief conversation with a friend inworld last night that turned out to be the text based equivalent to an elbow to the ribs and at least one black eye ;P Just kidding.

I think most every human feels a compulsion to defend themselves against repeated accusations of stalking, trolling, harassing, someone who mocks cancer, mental illness, a rape apologist, being bat shit crazy, pathological, the list goes on…and on…and on. These things are not true and while it seems legitimate in my mind to vigorously fight against these accusations, a self-defense is not what it appears as online. What seems obvious and logical as you sit behind your keyboard, does not translate in a crowd of strangers who have not spent the last 4.5 trying to undo the constant assertions of a very motivated manipulator. What ultimately happens is that you just do yourself in until you become a persona for which people do not hesitate to call cunt, irrelevant, bitch, bat shit crazy, so on and so forth. My compulsion to defend myself is a waste of time and energy, and realistically, I don’t require a defense.

For that reason, I am taking Ima off the grid. I cleared Ima’s friends list last night without explanation to those who were removed, but hopefully this post will shed light on the “why” of the action.

I enjoy SL photography, art, making poses, animations, building, learning Blender, etc. SL has been a part of me for nearly 7 years now and I have made some dear friends, and valued acquaintances. I will not leave SL, but I will start over with a new avatar that is unknown to everyone except those for which I care to be known by. It is not my goal to deceive others, but I, like most, would prefer to enjoy my SL in peace, and in a manner more consistent with who I really am instead who I have become known as. I take responsibility for the reputation, but it has become such a contrast to RL me that it is no longer comfortable.

I hope those that I removed so unceremoniously will accept a friend request from my new avatar, once she is established and understand, at least in part, my motivation for starting over.

Bonus: Clean Inventory

Happy SL’ing!